Death is a given. Even without gods and heavens, our ephemeral, biological essence is a magical part of the cycle of life in this earth. Yet, my heart can’t stop aching. The reality that Roger is gone feels so overwhelming, sometimes it’s hard to breath.
I’m grateful that I got a big goodbye hug from him 48 hours before he departed. I can still feel his warmth!
I’m grateful that he endured so much just to stay with us a little bit longer. 16 months of hell for him but hope for us!
I’m grateful that he was at the best of his life and got out of this earth feeling accomplished, respected and loved. I’m so proud of him!
I’m grateful for the privilege to birth him, raise him, see him grow into an amazing man. He always confronted me to be better!
But how cruel is this life to take away a son? And send a mother to enjoy the coming elder years with a hole in the heart.
I miss my son! No hope, prayer, god, heaven, despite the magical cycle of life, will allow me to enjoy him again in the now. Grieving for a child is an overwhelming reality!
My respect and love to all the mothers and fathers who experienced such loss and continued their journey without loosing joy in their hearts. They know (we know) how bittersweet life can become.